Circumstances vs Thoughts (and why this is extremely important to your happiness).

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In my group coaching program, Think Like A Boss, the first lesson we learn is about thoughts. It’s the fundamental knowledge necessary to truly change your life.

Thoughts are optional.

Thoughts are chosen only by YOU.

Thoughts cause you to feel things. Not other people. Not circumstances.

This is often a sticking point- people think that other people make you feel some way. Mad. Sad. Upset. Angry. Annoyed.

The truth of the matter is that YOU DECIDE how you feel at all times because of what you’re thinking.

This is sort of a bummer initially but it’s so freeing once you accept it.

Because what it means is that you can feel amazing or good or happy DESPITE how others are acting. You can still have an opinion about how people are acting, but you don’t have to feel terrible or trapped or unhappy.


  • Are neutral

  • Trigger thoughts

  • Are accepted as TRUTH by EVERYONE and can be proven in a court of law (in other words, circumstances are facts not opinions)

  • Are facts

Many people confuse circumstances and thoughts because they’re not used to differentiating between them. They also aren’t used to the fact that they create their own thoughts and other people would think something different in the same circumstance. Sure, many people could think the same thing- doesn’t make it a circumstance.

Stephanie Sheldon